Our family's adoption journey to Mia

Happy Birthday Mia!

2011-02-14T12:52:00.004-05:00

Happy 3rd birthday sweet Mia! My beautiful girl turned 3 years old yesterday! She has talked about her birthday for the past month due to her brothers reminding her that her birthday is "next." For a month she would talk about her "Dora birthday and her Dora birthday cake." So of course we delivered much to her delight! It was such a joy to watch her excitement as she opened her gifts and tried on her new clothes! The clothes and shoes were a bigger hit then the toys! She is her mother's daughter after all!

I simply cannot put into words the complete JOY that this child has brought into our family. It is just indescribable! The "3 s" are one of my favorite ages! I can't wait to see how my little girl blossoms this year!

December and updates

2010-12-14T08:58:00.007-05:00

Here I go again trying to update my blog after nearly a 3 month absence. I have struggled with what to do with this blog. I have considered closing my little corner of the blogging world due to, and I am just being honest here, my lack of desire to post. Facebook has taken over and all of my updates end up there. It seems like since Mia has joined our family this blog has taken a different turn and I am just not sure what I want to do with it. I love reading updates and seeing pics of kids who are growing and flourishing in their forever families. Some of my favorite blogs are families I have followed since we first began our adoption. Of course I love to follow the blogs of families on their journey to meet their child for the first time! That's part of the problem I enjoy reading others blogs but posting to my own has taken a back seat. For now I think I will try to post monthly updates so those few followers I may still have can continue to see how much sweet Mia has grown and changed! I am still astounded by her transformation!

Mia was released from PT and had her last evaluation in September. She recently started "mommy and me" gymnastics and loves it! I can't believe a year ago she was 21 month old "infant" not even sitting up and now she is in gymnastics! She loves to go to "bible class" as she calls it and will wave and blow kisses as we drop her off saying "bye mama, see you later." It is such a change from a few months ago when she would scream and cry when we would drop her off. It warms my heart that she knows we will be back to get her after class. The fear she had of being "left" has subsided.

We are looking forward to the upcoming holidays and spending them with friends and family. The winds of change are blowing and we can't wait to see what 2011 has in store for our family!

Cardio update

2010-09-14T13:58:00.004-04:00

Mia had her one year post op surgery appointment yesterday. As we got off the elevators, one of the areas of the hospital that families wait during surgery was overflowing. I remember a year ago sitting in those exact same chairs and feeling so overwhelmed with emotion and uncertainty. Last year I could only hold onto hope and faith that we would be where we are today. It was all good news from the cardiologist yesterday! The small VSD that was discovered after her surgery has closed and the cardiologist still believes Mia's heart is making its own rhythms without the use of the pacemaker! Mia does not have another appointment scheduled for 9 months!

On another note Ethan, Mia, and I visited my brother and his family in California two weeks ago. It was great to see them and meet my nephew for the very first time! Here are some pictures from our trip.

One year ago....

2010-09-08T19:17:00.003-04:00

my sweet girl underwent open heart surgery to correct her TOF defect. The memories of that day and ultimately the weeks that followed have faded with time though I will never forget the H*LL my daughter went through. I will also never forget how in awe I was of her strength and spirit. It is difficult to go back and read the posts from a year ago and the days that followed but I look at Mia now and I am thankful for the journey and surgery that ultimately saved her life. It is funny how the passage of time brings a different perspective. In a few days we will make our way back to the hospital for her one year check up. I am praying that everything looks good with her heart and we can say adios to the cardiologist for a year.

Pre surgery

Happy girl on the road to recovery

Mia~one year later

2010-07-24T07:08:00.008-04:00

Mia has been home with us for one year now and oh what a difference a year makes! She is a completely different child! A year ago she was a "baby" who was fragile, scared, and in desperate need of medical attention. When she was first handed to me she took my breathe away not because she was beautiful but because truthfully her appearance scared me. She was thin, malnourished, and bald. None of the pictures of those first few days truly captured how scared I was. In every picture I was hiding my fears behind my smiles. My fear continued to grow as Mia experienced "tet spells" due to her heart condition after breakfast almost every morning. By the second or third spell I was able to tell the signs that she was about to experience one and I would quickly put her knees to her chest and hold her while I walked up and down the hall trying to console her until she passed out in my arms. A blue coloring washed over her face, hands, and feet. I was scared and anxious to get home where medical attention was waiting for us. Sadly, because of my fears and all consuming desire to get home I wasn't able to enjoy China the way I wish I would have. Here are a few pictures from our first few days together.

Fast forward to a year later. The year certainly has not been easy and it has been full of numerous adjustments for all of us but it has been one of the most blessed and life changing years of my life! Mia is everything we could have hoped and prayed for in daughter! The little girl who was once so fragile is now healthy and full of life! She has overcome so many challenges both medically and in her development and it has been inspirational and a joy to watch her grow and blossom! It warms my heart to watch her play and hear her exclaim "I'm happy!" One year ago an empty place in my heart was filled when Mia was placed in my arms. I am forever blessed to call her my daughter! What an incredible gift she is!

Vacation pics part 2

2010-07-24T06:29:00.008-04:00

Our vacation recap

2010-07-24T05:53:00.003-04:00

We vacationed this year at Hilton Head, SC with my parents and sister. Oh how I love that place! It is a little bit of heaven on earth! We biked on the trails, sat on the beach, dug in the sand, swam at the pool, visited Pool Bar Jims(a couple times), and enjoyed some relaxing family time! We also had our family pictures taken on the beach. I have always wanted to have professional family beach portraits taken but since I knew it would be costly I wanted to wait until our family was complete and unless God says otherwise we are "complete." I also purposely scheduled them on our one year anniversary of having Miss Mia. I was mostly happy with the results though I do feel that some of the extra editing fees I had to pay could have been prevented if the photographer paid attention to detail (ex: Mia's diaper is showing in a couple of the pictures and we had to pay to have them "lengthen" her dress to cover it). Silly details like that but also costly adjustments.

Mia and Logan loved the beach but Ethan and Christian preferred the pool which worked out great because our condo was right on the beach! Logan and Mia would play in the sand and in the ocean most days while Ethan and Christian would swim at the pool. Dan is more of a pool person and I love the beach so we were all happy!

I took over 300+ pictures so I will post a few of my favorites over the next couple of days!

Ethan is 13!

2010-06-28T15:43:00.004-04:00

It's official. We now have a teenager in the house (gulp)! We celebrated this milestone birthday by taking him to lunch at Steak on a Stone and having family over for dinner later in the evening. Tonight he is having friends over to "hang out". Turning 13 deserves a week long birthday celebration don't ya think? It is hard to believe I have been blessed by the incredible gift of motherhood for 13 years now! Ethan enjoys playing soccer and is also taking guitar lessons. Ethan is becoming such a wonderful young man! He is kind, sensitive, and helpful. I am so proud of the person he is and can't wait to see who he becomes.

He adores her......

2010-05-26T07:30:00.004-04:00

and the feeling is mutual. She adores him. It is a sweet relationship. The last 10 months have been a little bumpy for him giving up his spot as the baby in the family. We have had to work through some jealousy issues though he keeps his feelings pretty well hidden. To someone looking in you would think he has adjusted just fine. But I know better. He has struggled and though it is getting better it is still there at times. It may be in the way he stares silently as he watches Mia and I play together or it may be how he acts out at times to get my attention. His place in the family changed the most when she arrived. He became the "middle" child. Add to that she was the first little girl in the family which brought even more attention for her and less for him.

Still he loves her and he is begining to settle into his place in our family as her big brother. He is fully aware of how much she loves him. She laughs hysterically at his silliness. She has discovered his passion for soccer and loves to chase and kick the ball around the yard with him. She loves to sit in the chair with him in the evening and share a snack. I love to watch the bond they are forming. It is a sweet relationship.

Mother's Day

2010-05-10T11:48:00.005-04:00

It was my first Mother's Day with all four of my kids! We took lots of pictures to mark the occasion. Logan loves taking pictures! He does a great job at trying to make Mia laugh(and is usually successful) while he is taking pictures of her. I was able to get pictures with each of the kids individually but the battery in the camera died before I was able to get one with all four of them.

The morning started off with Dan stopping by Panera Bread to pick up some bagels and cream cheese for breakfast. He was also sweet enough to bring home an iced green tea for me. The man knows me well! We had a light breakfast because Mia and I were skipping "all things soccer" today and going out to lunch with my mom and grandma. Soccer stops for nothing around here I tell ya, including Mother's Day! We had a nice lunch and afterwards we took "shop till you drop" to a whole new level. After shopping we drug ourselves to the nearest Starbucks for a much needed afternoon pick me up. Dinner was served by my dad and then followed by strawberry filled cake!

I am so blessed to be able to journey through motherhood with my four amazing kids! I love each one of them dearly and love being their mother. I am convinced there is no greater joy in this world than the joy of being their mother!

Mia did shop until she dropped!

One year ago today....

2010-04-26T08:48:00.006-04:00

we saw this face for the very first time and our lives have never been the same! It is hard to believe a year has already passed since we first saw Mia's sweet face! I remember it like it was yesterday. I opened the email sent to us by our agency containing her referral information and pictures. Her "mug shot" picture was the last picture I saw but it was the one that grabbed my heart immediately. Her eyes drew me in and captured my heart. I felt an instant connection to her. She was the one we had been waiting for for over three years. She was the one we prayed for, dreamt about, and longed for. In that one moment there she was. Revealed. She was the missing piece to our family puzzle. The road to her was long and difficult at times but I am so glad we took the journey that ultimately led us to one of the greatest blessings in our lives!

Happy Easter!

2010-04-05T14:03:00.004-04:00

Easter egg fun

2010-03-25T11:09:00.008-04:00

This past weekend Mia went on her first Easter egg hunt! She cruised around in her stroller and her brothers did the work of finding eggs and dropping them into her basket. It's great to have adoring brothers! She loved to try to open the eggs and see what sweet treat awaited her. Oh how she loves the Hershey kisses and Reeses peanut butter cups! After the hunt and overindulgence of candy Logan took Mia for a ride on the swings. Logan is a rough and tumble sports loving kid but Mia brings out his "sweet" side and it was fun to watch the two of them together. He gently swung on the swing with his sister ackwardly trying to hold her. Very sweet!

Kalahari pictures

2010-03-17T13:09:00.004-04:00

Ranch lovin girl

2010-03-01T19:07:00.005-05:00

This is what happens when Mia and ranch dressing combine! Actually any type of dipping sauce for that matter. Ketchup, ranch, and even applesauce. She is going through a stage of rubbing any type of dipping sauce through her hair. Take your eyes off of her for a minute and have one of these condiments on her plate and this is the result you are likely to get. Though I have to say this is some of her best work yet!

Cardiologist appointment

2010-03-01T18:23:00.003-05:00

Mia had a checkup with her cardiologist today. As soon as we stepped in the doctor's office the meltdown started and continued until an old friend showed up in the form of Versed. As soon as this magical potion took effect she was a calm and even smiley little girl. I am lovin the Versed because without it we would have a very combative and scared little girl on our hands=no fun. She laid still for her tests playing with the "stickers" on her chest and watching Dora. Her tests all looked very good and her cardiologist is very pleased with her progress. We will go back in six months for another checkup. Her cardiologist is certain that Mia is not using the pacemaker but it will stay in place unless she would need another surgery which we are hoping she will not need for years.

I am so thankful that I am able to breathe another sigh of relief and thank God that Mia is healthy. It is still so very hard for me to enter that hospital and walk past the PICU doors. As we were walking to the office there was a family in the main waiting room and I could tell by the looks of worry and anxiety on their faces that their child must be a patient in the PICU. I said a quick prayer for them as I walked by remembering the mix and height of emotions that a parent experiences when their child is in a critical state. I have yet to take Mia down the PICU hall to visit the nurses and doctors that took such wonderful care of her. I would love for them to see her looking so healthy! The difference in her in six months time is amazing! We have not made that visit mostly because I know at this point it would be too terrifying for her but also because I do not think I am ready. I do not think I could go past the room that she spent three weeks in without becoming emotional. I am not ready to relive those images and those days. Not yet anyway.

Today was a good day. A very good day. The feelings of anxiety and yes even fear that I walked in the hospital with were replaced with feelings of joy and a grateful heart for my healthy little girl.

Cake fun and more CNY!

2010-02-23T16:21:00.003-05:00

My first soccer ball

Playing Lucky Ducks

My first taste of my birthday cake!

I never "smashed" my cake instead I used my spoon and dug in! mmm good!

CNY celebration

2010-02-14T21:05:00.005-05:00

Tonight we went to a local Chinese buffet for dinner with our local adoption group. I was really looking forward to this evening not only because we finally had Mia home but because we were able to reconnect with other families who have also adopted children from China. During the pain of the wait we had taken a break from the adoption group and it was nice to see everyone again and share Mia with them. She is the youngest in the group and when it was time for the group picture she was not having it. She cried and was all drama! It actually reminded me of our red couch picture in China when she was the only baby screaming her head off. The boys enjoyed trying the different dishes and Mia loved her noodles as always. A fun evening was had by all.

Playing with my new kitchen set before CNY

Little drama queen

Happy 2nd Birthday sweet girl!

2010-02-13T19:36:00.003-05:00

Digging out

2010-02-09T16:44:00.004-05:00

The snow is here once again and this time I have enlisted the help of my boys to shovel the driveway! I figure its about time they learn the art of shoveling and with the way the snow is falling they are sure to get lots of practice! Awww the joy of boys! I get to instruct from the side door while they do the work! Life is good even if we are buried in snow!

Girly fun

2010-02-08T11:00:00.007-05:00

Mia has just started to show an interest in dolls much to my delight! What fun it is to play with dolls instead of trucks for a change! It is one that I welcome and am very much enjoying! This morning she pulled out one of her baby dolls and started to feed her a bottle and put her over her shoulder to "burp" her. Then it was time to beautify them "Mia style" for the day. She pulled out the brush and "combed" their hair. The poor baby dolls lost their pony tails and some of their hair in the process. She would pick each one up by the hair and then when she was done "styling" them she would toss her to the side and pick up the next baby. She even squeezed in some time "beautify" herself. I guess her mama's hair styling just wasn't doing it for her today! We might have a future beautician on our hands!

Mia's 2nd birthday is this Saturday. I can't believe my baby girl is turning two already! So what does a previous mom of all boys decide to buy her little girl for her birthday? A kitchen set of course! Mia loves to drag out any unused pots and pans while I am cooking. She will sit and stir her spoon in her pot and "cook" right alongside me. I planned on going all out on her kitchen set and executed that plan quite nicely much to my husband's dismay! He thinks this particular kitchen set is way above and beyond what any 2yr old needs. So practical he can be! In fairness I have to cut him some slack because he is new to this having a little girl thing and all of the additional "accessories" she requires. He nearly choked when I told him Mia already has 4 bathing suits for the summer because, well, I have discovered I have a slight addiction for cute little girl's bathing suits! Poor guy! He will really be loving me when he sits down to put it together! In addition to her kitchen set she will also get some pots and pans so she can "cook" us a meal. Now all we need is some play food and we will be all set. Why didn't someone tell me having a girl would be this much fun?

Reflecting on six months home

2010-01-17T11:06:00.009-05:00

January 2010

What a month this has been so far! You have learned to crawl and your language has exploded! You are losing your "baby" look and are starting to look more like a little girl. You have changed so much and you are growing so quickly!

December 2009

You visited the cardiologist for what seems like the hundreth time and she was very pleased with your progress! You also have gained 5lbs since surgery! Yeah! Christmas was extra special this year!

November 2009

You began physical and occupational therapy and we celebrated our first Thanksgiving with you home! We had fun decorating the tree and seeing the look on your face when you saw all of the lights for the very first time.

October 2009

A month of recovering and readjusting to family life. You still amaze us with how easily you are transitioning into our family and how happy you are despite everything you have been through.

September 2009

The month of your life saving surgery filled with so many unexpected ups and downs. I will never forget this month and still have difficulty remembering and looking at pictures of "our" journey through this month. It was life changing to say the least.

August 2009

You are adjusting beautifully to your new home and new family.
What a JOY you are!

July 2009

We travel to China to bring you home! What an amazing journey it was!

She makes me smile....

2010-01-13T22:16:00.003-05:00

Oh how I love this little girl!

Christmas recap

2009-12-28T14:43:00.007-05:00

We had a very merry Christmas complete with presents, family, and lots of good food! The boys woke up at 4am on Christmas morning all ready to open their presents. Call me a scrooge but I told them they needed to go back to bed for a couple more hours until they tore into their presents. I *think* they ended up camping in the living room and not so patiently waiting until we woke up and gave them the go ahead. Mia woke up around 8:30am and saw her presents and was all ready to dive into the fun! Santa was very good to the kids this year and I think they were all happy with their gifts.

We spent Christmas day at my parent's house. My sister and brother in law were there along with my grandma. This was the first time my grandma has met Mia so it made Christmas even more special! My sister and brother in law surprised us with a video of Mia's homecoming and of the last few months with her. It was so special and I cried watching it remembering everything that has happened in the past 5 months and how far Mia has come. I can say it over and over again but it is nothing short of miraculous how much she has changed and grown. Looking at the video I was reminded of the fragile condition she was in. To look at her now I am so amazed by her and in awe of the work that God has done in her life and continues to do. How blessed we are to be part of her story!

It's Christmas time again.....

2009-12-23T13:57:00.008-05:00

and now you're HOME

Your family is here so you will never be alone

so tonight before you go to sleep I'll hold you in my arms

and I'll tell you from my heart I

wish you "Merry Christmas"

~ Merry Christmas

Third Day

Mia update

2009-12-11T13:51:00.006-05:00

It has been 5 months since we have been home with our sweet little Mia. It feels like she has always been here with us. I remember praying during the wait that Mia's little heart would accept our love and that she would bond supernaturally to us. God has blessed us beyond all expectations! Dan asked me the other day if I ever "forget" that she is adopted and I answered him "all of the time." I am not sure if this makes sense but I do not even think of her as being "Chinese" meaning that is not what I see of when I look at her. I look at her and just see "our beautiful, strong, amazing, daughter." She is and always will be our daughter first. So what has little Mia been up to?

~She had her cardiologist appointment last week and she is officially off all of her medicines. She also has gained 3 lbs since surgery! Still a tiny little girl but she is gaining! Her EKG showed that she was not using the pacemaker and was making her own heart rhythms! She still has a very small VSD but her cardiologists expects it to close on its own and has said that even it it doesn't it is so small it will not affect her. She was very happy with Mia's progress! Our next checkup is in March.

~She does both occupational and physical therapy each once a week. She enjoys when we "go play" and is making great progress! She is up on all fours and we are hoping she starts crawling soon. In the meantime she has her own way of being mobile. She sits on her bottom and scoots. It is hilarious to watch! I am sure we will wear out the bottoms of many pairs of pants!

~Her language is also exploding! She says mama, dada, bye bye, Dora (as in the explorer), Bob Bob (as in Spongebob), mine, all done, thank you and the list continues to grow daily.

~Her eating habits have also improved. No more chipmunking her food~yeah! She will eat pretty much whatever is put in front of her but when she is done she is DONE! She loves banana cream pediasure and drinks about 2 1/2 a day!

~Her biggest entertainment besides her brothers is iCarly. Yes iCarly. Not your typical toddler show but she prefers iCarly to any other show. Gotta love those brothers and an extended hospital stay which =lots of TV!

We have had so much fun preparing for the holidays with her!. For the past two Christmases it has been hard to decorate the tree with the ornaments we have been collecting for her. This year her ornaments were the first ones placed on the tree. I was teary eyed holding her and letting her decorate the tree. She is FINALLY home! Praise God!

Family pictures

2009-12-04T07:55:00.004-05:00

We returned to the photo studio this past weekend to have our family pictures taken. It had been (gulp) six years since we have had our family picture taken and since we now have our sweet little Mia we were in desperate need of a new photo. Oh how I dread, seriously dread, getting family pictures taken! Did I just type that!? I love the result (usually) but it is so much work! Coordinating outfits, getting everyone dressed, trying to keep outfits clean and ironed until after pictures, and oh yeah getting six people to smile or at least make it appear that we all like each other (just kidding!).

Anyway I really should go downstairs and scan these pictures so the "kiddie kandids" stamp is not on them but truth be told I am too lazy and I need to get Mia to PT. I also need to do an update post on Miss Mia because she really is progressing nicely but I will save that for another day very soon I promise.

*Ugh and I just realized "the stamp" is right across Mia's face in the kids picture!

Thankful

2009-11-26T08:22:00.004-05:00

As I reflect on all of God's many blessings in my life I am overwhelmed by how good He is. I have an amazing husband who supports me and loves me everyday of our lives. I have four wonderful children who fill each day with joy. Our amazing church where we are free to worship and grow under the Word. Our extended family and friends who are such a blessing in our lives and have gone above and beyond this year. Our home that is filled with love and laughter and yes sometimes the of arguing of three boys and whining of a little girl (I still love it!). There is so much to celebrate and be thankful for!

Mia's first photo shoot

2009-11-16T14:45:00.005-05:00

I took Mia to have her first professional pictures taken today. Her red velvet dress matched her ivory cardigan sweater that matched her ivory tights with the tiny red bow on the back of her little ankle. She had a coordinating red velvet bow in her hair and shiny black shoes on to complete "the look". Yet the only added accessory you will find in her pictures is the red hairbow! Our photo session started out a little bumpy with Mia crying at the sight of the poor photographer. Tears streaming down her face (and dress!) and I thought there was no way we were going to get a decent photo. As I started to "de-accessorize" her she slowly warmed up and we got some great smiles out of her!

I am really happy with her pictures! So happy that all six of us get to do it again in a couple weeks when we return for family pictures!

Happy 8th birthday to my sweet boy....

2009-11-07T12:40:00.005-05:00

You bring more joy to my life than you could ever imagine with your sweet smile and zest for life! I love you so much!

Like mother like daughter

2009-11-05T11:23:00.004-05:00

Hey where is that music coming from?

I am going to figure this thing out!

I am putting this on my Christmas list! I have been a very good girl!

Update on appointments of the past week and random pictures

2009-10-31T22:13:00.006-04:00

It was a busy busy week with all of Mia's various appointments. Her cardiologist appointment went well on Tuesday. She still has a small VSD but her heart was making its own rhythms when her pacemaker was checked. That is very good news because the hope is that she will eventually regain her own rhythm and will not need the pacemaker. Time will tell but it is great news! We are also going to be weaning her off of her medications over the next month and we will go back in December for another checkup. Her incision looks great and is healing nicely!

We also had an appointment at the local adoption clinic. I "heart" this clinic because they really get it when it comes to caring for the needs of adopted children. Her developmental skills were evaluated and she also had a medical exam. She will be starting PT soon and what I love about the facility that we will be going to is that it is family based meaning the parents are part of the PT sessions. We also met with a psychologist to address any social or emotional needs she may have. We are not having any bonding or attachment issues that we can see at this time. Praise God and praying that this continues! The doctor felt that based on our conversation Mia was doing very well bonding to us. Her medical exam went well though we are going to meet with the feeding team. Mia has started to "chipmunk" her food. She will eat a couple bites of food and then keep it in the roof of her mouth for sometimes over an hour. This just started after her surgery. The thought is that since her hospitalization was so long and difficult on her and that she had no control over what was happening to her that she is now controlling the food in her mouth. It makes sense, right? It doesn't happen every day but is frequent enough that we want to address it before it becomes a real problem. If she wasn't underweight we would probably wait to see if this phase would pass but she really needs every calorie she can get.

In a nutshell, there you have it, our past week recap! Lots of progress was made and I am looking forward to more to come!

Happy Halloween!

2009-10-31T22:04:00.002-04:00

Can you believe all of our leaves? Seriously. We just had them cleaned up less than a week ago. It gives our Halloween photo that extra "fallish" look don't ya think?

Floor time

2009-10-26T17:22:00.006-04:00

We have a couple appointments scheduled to have Mia evaluated for physical and occupational therapy. Unfortunately the one center that offers for the therapists to come out to your home for the therapy has a wait list of 2-3 months. We are going to fill out the paperwork to get on the list but in the meantime have another appointment at a local international adoption clinic for a second evaluation this week. Tommorow Mia has her 6 week cardiologist appointment at 8:00am. Oh how I dread, dread, dread, walking back into that hospital. The memories are still too fresh in the mind. This will definitely be a Starbucks worthy morning and it will be my first stop at the hospital. I might even order an extra shot and a venti just to get me through the morning full of test and what I am sure will be a tired and uncooperative girl!

We try to have alot of floor time at home. Most days Mia is all for it and cooperates. She is generally a happy little girl but today she fussed and I decided it was camera worthy and deserved to be documented. Of course the fussing didn't last long especially after she noticed the camera was out!

For the Bengals fans.....

2009-10-19T10:51:00.003-04:00

Aunt Dani and Uncle Brian are big Bengals fans! Uncle Brian bought Mia her first football jersey and she was sporting it on Sunday. I, of course, appreciate that it is pink! On a side note Christian also proudly wore his Browns coat yesterday when we had some "mommy and me" time and went to lunch. There aren't any fair weather fans in this house! Yep they stay true to their teams win or lose (even if the lose every game~lol!).

All smiles at home

2009-10-09T12:01:00.004-04:00

Post op checkup

2009-10-08T13:49:00.003-04:00

I held my breath as we entered the hospital for Mia's first post op checkup this morning. Mia has done beautifully since coming home and we haven't noticed any signs of her being in distress. Still I knew her chest x-ray would determine our fate. There were two possible scenarios. If the "stubborn left chest fluid" had increased we would be readmitted to the hospital. If it stayed the same or absorbed we would be allowed to return home. WE ARE HOME TO STAY! Her chest x-ray was clear and the fluid is GONE! PRAISE GOD! It feels amazing to breathe that last sigh of relief and to finally be able to really enjoy being at home.

Going home!!!!!

2009-10-05T10:33:00.003-04:00

After 4 weeks at the hospital we have finally been cleared to go home! I have to start packing up 4 weeks of "stuff"! Next post will be from home sweet home!

Weekend hospital happenings

2009-10-04T18:12:00.002-04:00

I am sitting in Mia's hospital room waiting for the nurse to pull out her chest tube. There is still a tiny amount of fluid but the doctors are pleased with the result of the procedure. We were given the option to pull the chest tube tonight or tommorow and after her chest x-ray revealed that her chest tube is starting to fall out it was decided to pull it tonight. She will have another chest x-ray tommorow morning and if it looks good we will be on our way home. I can't wait to get home but I am trying not to get my hopes up just in case. Unfortunately I have learned not to get my hopes too high throughout this process. Sad but true. Hopefully tommorow we will be saying goodbye to our overextended hospital stay and this last month will begin to become a distant memory.

Out of recovery and back in her room

2009-10-02T17:20:00.004-04:00

The procedure went great and Mia is back to to her happy and smiling self. She was playing with a styrofoam cup and oxygen tube when I first saw her. The next couple of days will determine if the procedure worked. I am praying hard that it does.

I am leaving the hospital for the weekend and will return on Sunday. My mom is staying with her tonight and Dan will stay with her tommorow. I am looking forward to spending some time with the boys and sleeping in my own bed. Other than that I could care less if I do much else because I am exhausted and really just want to enjoy the comforts of home if only for a few days!

Procedure underway

2009-10-02T12:41:00.003-04:00

I was able to stay with Mia until she was completely sedated in the operating room. It was heartwrenching to say the least. She grabbed for my face and looked deep into my eyes as she fought to stay awake. I kept stroking her hair and telling her "it was okay" and that "I loved her." The anesthesiologist sang "row row row your boat" to her as she fell asleep. It was very sweet! We are a little over an hour and a half into the two hour procedure so I am hoping to get called soon to come back and see her.

Procedure today

2009-10-02T07:06:00.003-04:00

Mia is going to be having the sclerosing procedure today to hopefully eliminate the fluid on her left side. It is a very painful procedure but she will be sedated so she should not feel anything. I am hoping that I will be able to be in the procedure room with her to comfort her. It should take 2 hrs or so and during that time they will be rotating her to make sure that the medicine coats all sides of her. The goal is that the medicine helps the lungs adhere to the chest wall not allowing the fluid to collect. The surgeon told me that it has a high success rate and at this point it is the best option to try. I am hoping that we end up in the category of "high success" especially since she doesn't have a ton of fluid and this procedure is usually performed in more complex cases. She can have the procedure performed up to three times if necessary. I am aware of the alternate options if this doesn't work but I am trying not to let my mind go there because they are more invasive and she will ultimately end up back in surgery.

Please pray that this works for her today with minimal amount of pain. I am beyond desperate to see the light at the end of this very long tunnel. Mia needs to get home. We need our family back together under one roof. I miss my boys terribly and feel like I have abandoned them. They are handling our separation very well (I am so proud of them!) but I need to get home to them. I need to resume my motherly duties to them. I have missed so many of their football and soccer games. I have been completely "out of the loop" with their schooling. I miss my husband. Dan and I have literally passed each other as we switch shifts at the hospital. My parents have been amazing with helping us and I will never be able to thank them enough. They even rescheduled a much deserved vacation to be here for us. They need their lives back.

As I said before despite all of the events of the past month I would do this all over again in a second for Mia. Before her surgery it would anger me that she was allowed to live in China without the surgery she so desperately needed. I shutter to think about if she had had surgery in China and experienced these complications what would have happened to her. After all that she has been through she smiles at everyone(as long as they are not touching her), waves bye bye, and blows kisses. She is such an example of facing challenges with a positive spirit and a smile. There have been many times that I have needed to take a lesson from her. Who would have thought in spite of her own struggles and pain that she would have taught me a lesson on how to conquer? Still as her mother I long for her pain and struggle to end. Today I pray her end to this chapter is closer so her next chapter can begin.

Preparing for the final word on the next procedure

2009-10-01T09:24:00.003-04:00

While we still have not received official word there are rumors this morning that Mia will be having the "uncommon" procedure today to inject her chest tube and hopefully dissolve the fluid. Again I was told it is pretty painful so I will be requesting the max sedation that they can give her. I am still waiting on rounds to hear the final verdict but that is where we are heading. She will also have an echo while she is sedated. Big sigh.

Chest tube troubles again......sigh

2009-09-30T18:19:00.003-04:00

Mia still has her chest tube in that was placed on Saturday however it has twisted at the incision site several times causing irritation. Obviously when it becomes twisted the fluid is not draining properly. Yesterday it put out 20 ccs and today it put out 50 ccs so far. The nurses have been coming in frequently to check it and to redo the dressing. Her chest x-rays have really improved over the past couple of days but there is still come collapse in the left lung allowing the fluid to collect. The plan is to watch the output overnight and look at the chest x-ray in the morning. One of two things is going to happen. The best case scenario would be for the fluid drainage to be minimal and the chest x-ray to look good in the morning and then take out the chest tube and wait 24hrs to take another x-ray to see how the lungs look. The not so good scenario would be that there is still significant fluid and then the doctors would sedate Mia and inject a medicine into the chest tube, clamp it, and rotate her to make sure the medicine coats the lungs to stop the fluid collection. The downside besides another sedation is that it is painful but I am told Mia will not feel it. The nurse also said that it is very rare to have to have this procedure done in a child with TOF. I laughed when she said this because clearly Mia is not the normal straight forward case. I am really hoping for the best case scenario but of course preparing for the not so good scenario knowing that this will probably be the scenario that we will end up with. I know that sounds pessimistic but I am so tired of hoping for the best and ending up with the the "unlikely" scenario. I really want my little girl to "catch a break" in this recovery and for once not have to experience the more painful option. Just once.

Three weeks ago and a wagon ride

2009-09-29T14:23:00.002-04:00

It has now been three weeks since Mia's first surgery. Three weeks. It isn't long given all that she has been through but I swear I have emotionally and physically felt every minute of these past three weeks. It has been a long journey but I know we will look back 6 months from now and it will just be a "blip on the radar screen."

We moved to our own room yesterday which has been a blessing. The parent accomodations still aren't great but I think it is the first night in three weeks that I have slept through the night not counting being at home. I am still very sleep deprived and my back is really starting to bother me from not sleeping in a bed. Mia is over being at the hospital. She is pulling out every tube and wire she can get her hands on. As I type she has pulled out her cannula for the millionth time today and I am just watching her stats and letting her be. It will be odd to hold her again without having to worry about disrupting a tube or wire.

Today we did manage to get out of the room for a little bit and take a wagon ride. She really enjoyed going to the big fish tank and to the playroom to pick out some new toys. Right now I am trying to get her to nap but she only wants to nap if I am rocking her in the rocking chair. I keep telling her we are starting a bad habit but right now I am in survival mode and will do whatever works and fix it once we are home.

I know everyone wants to know when we think we will be home. I am not even going to try to answer that question for obvious reasons. The doctors say we are in the homestretch. I am just not sure how long the homestretch will last.

Goodbye to the PICU

2009-09-27T13:31:00.004-04:00

Mia was moved today to the step down unit which is a great milestone but it has caused some anxiety in her. We do not have our own room and are currently sharing the pod with two other families. The only "privacy" we have are the curtains that divide the patients. I notice a look of fear and uncertainty on her face as she listens to other children cry and I wonder if it brings back memories of the orphanage. I am sure it does and it breaks my heart. It certainly is less than ideal for a child that has lived most of her life in and orphanage. She looks at me with an emotionless look on her face and has cried off and on. I can only imagine the confusion she is feeling. She also needed to have the chest tube placed yesterday and it has drained quite a bit of fluid. Hopefully that will subside within the next few days. At this point I am not even going to guess when we might be going home. I am grateful that we are in step down unit in spite of it being "less than ideal" for Mia. It does mean we are closer to being home.

Mia enjoyed her short visit with the boys today. They were here for about a 1/2 hr and then had to get home to get ready for Ethan's soccer game. *Good news*.... the nurse just walked in and asked us if we would like to share a room with a family and their daughter that we have become friends with throughout our stay! Of course I graciously took them up on their offer so we will be moving yet again and having a slumber party tonight! Praise God that He cares about even the smallest details! This will make our extended stay a bit easier.

Goodbye to another tube

2009-09-25T20:43:00.002-04:00

The chest tube is not going to be replaced for now. She does still have a small amount of fluid in her lungs but the doctors are hoping it will absorb on its own. We are leaving the PICU tommrow and moving to the step down unit! Yahooo! I am still a little apprehensive about this next step given the challenges of the past couple of weeks but it is certainly a milestone to celebrate! Mia is full of smiles and laughter and the nurses and staff are constantly coming to her room to try and get a smile out of her which she freely gives unless they are touching her. We are constantly getting compliments on how adorable she is! Of course we already knew this!

I left the hospital for home until Sunday. It was hard to leave and I know I will struggle with wanting to be at the hospital this weekend but my parents and Dan are taking turns staying with her. She is in very capable hands even though the mom in me longs to be the one to meet her every need. I am really begining to feel the effects of spending 2 1/2 weeks at the hospital. I was exhausted after a few days but now I am almost delirious at times from sleep deprivation and the rollercoaster ride of emotions. Tonight Christian had a soccer game and he was suppose to be at the field at 5:30pm. I feel asleep for a little bit and woke up at 5:26pm. I asked him why he didn't wake me up and he told me he said "I tried to wake you by calling your name and shaking you but you wouldn't wake up." That is how exhausted I am and if there is any chance that Mia will be coming home in the next week I need to recover.

I am praying for a weekend of continued healing for Mia and continued strength and recovery for myself and my family. Maybe just maybe rumors will begin to swirl about us coming home!

Chest tube troubles

2009-09-24T20:36:00.002-04:00

The results of the chest x-ray are in.....and the chest tube has almost completely fallen out thus causing the the left lung to look diminished. We are still not sure if it is all fluid or a combination of collapse and fluid. Tonight the chest tube was removed and will be placed again tommorow morning. Sigh. The good news is Mia isn't showing any signs of being affected by this latest turn of events. We shall see what tommorow brings and hopefully it is all good.

Bumbo baby

2009-09-24T18:58:00.002-04:00

New challenges

2009-09-24T16:13:00.003-04:00

Miss Mia had her chest tube placed last night and the result was bloody fluid. Gross, huh? It isn't fresh and is not related to her eating. That I am told is good news. The best "guess" as to why it developed is that it could be due to irritation from respiratory therapy working to get secretions out of her lungs. She had a full blood work up and everything looked good so we may not get a solid answer for why it is there. It is starting to run clear so that is also good news.

I love that she is finally returning to her "old self" don't get me wrong but it has brought its own set of "challenges." Her sleep schedule is a wreck! She barely sleeps here in the PICU and if she does it is in 10-20 min increments. She is so tired but the constant activity is keeping her wide awake. She is also managing to wiggle around just enough to end up at the end of the bed. She is crabby and who wouldn't be with all that she has been through? She is obsessed with trying to get all of her wires out and has succeeded more than once. Today I actually had the nurse restrain her left hand after she pulled the cannula out of her nose numerous times.

I am trying so hard to be patient with all that is happening. I am desperately searching for any amount of light at the end of this very dark tunnel. As I type this post the respiratory therapist just listened to her and said she hears more diminishment in her left lung and the doctor has ordered another chest x-ray. I am teary eyed and bracing myself once again for what this could possibly be and ultimately mean to her recovery process.

Looking for the end in sight

2009-09-23T13:56:00.003-04:00

Mia's little personality is coming back more and more with each new day! Today she will need to have a chest tube put back in. She started eating yesterday and the fat from the food is causing some fluid to collect in her chest. We are told it is not uncommon for this to happen. Another small setback for an already slow and difficult recovery. I was really looking forward to hearing that we were being moved to the step down unit today and we would be one step closer to home. I am trying to focus on the positives and I know that we are moving in the right direction but I am tired of all of the setbacks. I try to look at the "grand scheme" of things and know that the memory of these past 2 1/2+ weeks will eventually fade. Ultimately Mia's life was saved with this surgery and while the journey has been unimaginable at times I would do it all again in a second. I am hoping by the weekend there will be an end in sight or at least talk of us moving closer towards home.

Making progress slowly......

2009-09-21T11:15:00.005-04:00

Mia had a great night Saturday night and there was even talk about moving to the step down unit on Monday. On Sunday afternoon she began to breathe harder and had a fever. Her white blood cell count was a little high so she was started on an broad spectrum antibiotic while we are awaiting results of her blood and urine cultures. In Mia's case I am glad that they are being cautious and proactive with her care. She was on a higher amount of oxygen yesterday but it was lowered today and she seems to be tolerating it. She also started eating yesterday but began to vomit. She hasn't had a bowel movement in about a week so they gave her a suppository and dulcolax and let's just say it worked like a charm. Today they pulled her last chest tube and her central line. Her central line may be the source of the fever since it has been in for two weeks though the line was changed last week in surgery. They did put an IV in her hand just as a precaution.

So we are making progress slowly but surely. Of course it is not as quickly as we would have hoped but we rejoice in any amount of progress at this point big or small. I apologize that this post is all over the place. I feel like my thoughts and mind are a bit foggy. Two weeks in the hospital will do that to you! I am so looking forward to getting home and back to our routine~maybe we will be homeward bound this week.

Pictures

2009-09-19T11:54:00.003-04:00

Presurgery jitters for mom and Mia

Cautiously optimistic

2009-09-19T11:16:00.003-04:00

Mia is now off the ventilator! They removed her breathing tube around 11:30pm last night. In previous attempts to extubate she was reintubated at the 12 hour mark so we have now gone past that and she is doing great! They also removed her catheter so that is two tubes gone in one day! The nurse did agree to take her arm retraints off as long as I am in the room with her so she is loving that she has use of her hands again. She is clapping her hands despite having an IV in one hand. My eyes are constantly fixed on her because she is quite busy trying to pull at her tubes. Just now she has managed to remove the tape from the IV in her foot all in about 5 seconds! She is so quick! I am cautiously optimistic that we have finally reached a turning point and we are on the road to recovery!

I have been taking alot of pictures to document her surgery. I do have few that I will share soon now that she has her breathing tube out. Unfortunately my SD card is not working so as soon as Dan visits today I will see if he can figure it out. Obviously I will not post pictures right after surgery but if anyone is having a child about to experience OHS and would like to prepare themselves for what they might see after surgery I am happy to share.

Resting

2009-09-18T11:18:00.002-04:00

Mia is still on the ventilator but they are begining to wean it down again today. Yesterday they were able to wean her down to a low setting but then she wasn't tolerating it very well. It seemed to me to be a little premature for all that she has been through. The plan is to very slowly wean her off it so it may be tommorow before they are able to extubate. One of her chest tubes is out. She looks really good and is sleeping peacefully. One of the nurses put a small yellow bow in her hair. She looks adorable!

Second surgery update

2009-09-17T12:23:00.002-04:00

The second surgery went well and the surgeon was very pleased with the result. The pressure is much lower and he doesn't expect that she will need any additional surgery until she is in her teens or early adulthood. He did say they noticed what might be a very small VSD between the two chambers of the heart but he expected that it would close on its own and they would continue to watch it closely. As they rolled Mia back to her room in the PICU she was already starting to wake up from the surgery.

I did decide to come home last night because the days events and the past week have really taken its toll. I have a room at the Ronald McDonald house but knew that if I stayed there I would be back up at the hospital early and I knew I needed to take a much needed break. I woke up with the boys this morning and got them off to school and went back to bed myself. I did a few things around the house and still need to shower for the day as it is now 12:30pm. I really felt like I needed to experience some of my "normal routine" in order to prepare myself for the recovery ahead. I talked to the cardiologist today and she said Mia is doing wonderful! They are starting to lower the vent and are considering removing her from the vent sometime today. I am not sure how I feel about this. Of course I want her off of the vent but I also want to make sure she is strong enough to tolerate it and given the events of the past week I am more apprehensive this time.

Once again thank you so much for all of the prayers and comments. It means so much to know that there are so many people praying for our little girl!

Second open heart surgery....

2009-09-16T18:06:00.004-04:00

Mia is currently undergoing her second open heart surgery in a week. The plan was to have a pacemaker placed and to repair her diaphragm. When the surgeon checked the pressure around her heart it was too high so she needed a second operation. What was suppose to be a fairly minor procedure has turned major. The good news is that she shouldn't need another surgery until she is in her teens or early adulthood. Still I am baffled by how many mountains my poor daughter is having to climb. Tonight I am thankful that she is alive but I am beside myself. Please please pray extra hard for her tonight.

Some answers....

2009-09-15T16:27:00.003-04:00

Mia had another repeat ultrasound of her diaphragm this afternoon and it has indeed been injured during the surgery. Not the best of news but I did breathe a sigh of relief knowing that this is the reason her left lung continues to collapse after being extubated. Tommorow while placing the pacemaker they will also repair the diaphragm with is a "fairly minor procedure". No procedure feels "minor" at this point with all that she has been through. The surgeon also said he does not think that she will need a pacemaker long term and that he really feels that her heart will eventually find its rhythm. The surgeon will also check the pressure in her heart due to the pulmonary stenosis. If there is a high pressure he will need to do another open heart procedure to reduce the pressure. He does not expect to have to do this but it is a possibility.

Once again please continue to keep praying for Mia. Please pray for a miraculous recovery for our little girl so she can go home and start her "new" life!

Heartfelt thanks

2009-09-15T12:48:00.004-04:00

In the midst of all that is going on we need to thank each and every person that has visited our blog and left a comment, prayed for sweet Mia, or posted to their blog asking for prayers for Mia. We are humbled and overwhelmed by the support and prayers that are being offered by total strangers, friends, and family. I have tears in my eyes as I read each and every comment and feel the prayers being said for us and Mia. You never truly know until you are in a difficult situation especially with one of your children how much this means. The few moments it has takes to post a comment have meant the world to us and at times come at the exact moment that we needed encouragement. What a gift it will be to share with Mia one day about the love, concern, and support of family, friends, and strangers who held her up in prayer during such a tremedous trial in her life.

Giving it to God

2009-09-15T11:42:00.005-04:00

I am still waiting to meet with the surgeon but I have talked to the cardiologist and nurses and the plan is for a pacemaker to be placed tommorow. Again, this is not exactly what I want to hear and I am still believing that some miraculous healing will happen and it won't be necessary. I have decided today to stand firm on my faith that God will heal Mia and will give us the strength to face these challenges. Instead of letting the reports of today cause an emotional drain on me I am going to continue to confess what God says. He will give us strength, He is our healer, He is able to meet all our needs, He never leaves us or forsakes us. I have quit trying to determine in my head why all of this is happening and have chosen this moment to draw closer to God and to rely on Him when my own understanding fails. I know He does not want us to be in a state of confusion but of peace. I know He has a plan for Mia and though I do not know that plan I have to trust it.

Yet another setback......

2009-09-14T11:49:00.004-04:00

I am keeping this short because it is getting too difficult to keep rehashing "the latest" to family and friends especially when the latest is another setback. Mia was put back on the ventilator this morning. Once again I kissed my little girl with tears streaming down my face as I left her room for her to go through intubation once again. She had an ultrasound of her diaphragm(sp? too exhausted to look it up) to see if the nerve was injured during surgery. If this is the case they may need to go in and repair it and are also considering placing the pacemaker at the same time. Another possible scenario it that since her body was so malnourished that she is having a difficult time recovering. For now the plan is to keep her on the ventilator for the next couple of days to allow her body to recover.

Please continue to lift us up in prayer. I am so physically and emotionally exhausted. I desperately want some good news and I am struggling why my daughter has had to endure so much in her short life. I am trying to trust in God's plan but right now it is difficult. I am not going to lie, as my daughter has struggled my faith has also. I know I cannot lean on my own understanding but I have to trust in Him.

Off the vent....again

2009-09-13T22:23:00.002-04:00

Mia is now off the vent again. She is doing really well and the respiratory team said her lungs sound great. Now we just need to get her coughing to move all the secretions in her chest! When they removed the tube I left to get ready for bedtime and they said she was saying "mama." I felt horrible that I wasn't there. Now she is sleeping comfortable but I am happily looking forward to a long night now that she can cry and call for me. It will be sweet music to my ears!

Wake up sleeping beauty

2009-09-13T19:09:00.002-04:00

It is 7:00pm and we are still waiting for Mia to wake up so they can take her off of the vent. She is breathing on her own but they haven't been able to remove the vent because they want her to be very awake. So I sit and wait. The boys were up visiting her tonight because due to school and sports activities I don't know when they will be able up to see her again. They did really well seeing her despite the breathing tube and numerous wires.

As I listen to her day nurse brief the night shift nurse she mentioned that Mia is 19 months old today. She has also been with us two months today! With everything going on I completely forgot. Please keep the prayers coming!

Making progress

2009-09-13T11:30:00.002-04:00

I talked to Dan earlier this morning and he said Mia's left lung is looking great! In fact there is talk about removing the ventilator this afternoon. At this point they are begining to ween her from the vent to see how she tolerates it. Her heart is also continuing to regain its rhythm so we are hopeful that it will fully continue to heal and a pacemaker will not be needed.

Today the plan is to go to Ethan's soccer game this afternoon and then head up to the hospital. Part of me wants to be there "if" they remove the vent but the other part thinks it will do me some good so be out of the hospital and with the boys. I really feel like I need to experience some of our "normal" life. I feel so much better after a good night's sleep and being at home. I really needed this.

Quick update

2009-09-12T22:02:00.003-04:00

Dan is at the hospital tonight with Mia. I came home to spend some time with the boys and get out of the hospital for a night. Before I left she had a chest x-ray and her left lung seems to be clearing which is great news! There isn't any fluid around the lung which is good because she would have needed a chest tube to drain it. They will continue the treatments throughout the night and repeat another x-ray tommorow morning. The doctor actually said it looked better than expected! Praise God!

Off to spend time with the boys and hopefully get a good night's sleep!

Not much to report

2009-09-12T16:05:00.003-04:00

Mia is still on the ventilator and still receiving treatments from the respiratory team which involves taking a vibrating disc like machine to the back of her left side to loosen whatever may be in the lung. After the treatment they suction her out through her nose and mouth. This morning they loosened through suction some "fresh blood" and the doctors are thinking it could be a clot that might be responsible for the collapse. Obviously it is a wait and see approach. The good news is that it is a matter of "when" will the lung regain its full function not "if". Tonight they will do another chest x-ray to check her progress. Everything else looks good and I just continue to pray that we overcome this setback soon.

A few people have e-mailed me and asked me if it would be okay to link our blog to theirs so others can pray. We absolutely believe in the power of prayer and would appreciate the prayers so feel free to add our link to your blog if you would like.

A Big step backwards

2009-09-12T07:47:00.003-04:00

Mia started to have trouble breathing last night so she is back on the ventilator. The left lung has some collapse in it and there might also be some fluid. It came as quite a shock this morning as we went to bed being told that her lungs sounded great. After a night of her babbling and calling "mama" I sobbed the hardest I have since being here at this news. Before they reintubated her she was holding her blanket and the doctors took it from her and gave it to me. She reached out her little hand for it and I had to leave the room, blanket in hand. We are still waiting on the results of the chest x-ray to see what the plan of action is. I will keep everyone posted but in the meantime, pray hard that she is able to quickly overcome this setback.

Turning the corner

2009-09-11T23:44:00.002-04:00

Praise God we have finally turned the corner today! Not only are the chest tubes out but Mia is now off the ventilator and doing great! Her little personality is slowly coming back! I was able to lay in bed beside her for awhile tonight and I found myself just staring at her with tears in my eyes. She started to call "mama" and my heart melted. I needed to hear her little voice! This is a quick post because I need to go tend to my girl who is very awake this evening! Thank you so much for all of the prayers! Keep them coming!

Small steps forward

2009-09-11T10:01:00.002-04:00

Mia had her chest tubes removed this morning! Another small step forward. As I sit by her bedside, they are working on lowering the ventilator and "hope" to have her off of it later today. The doctor said that she feels confident that it will be gone by tommorow. I think the fever that lingered held us back as far as progress goes. You quickly learn in this process that it is one step forward and two steps back. It has been an emotional rollercoaster for sure. But I will take any amount of progress however small it may.

The doctors and nurses are great here which definitely makes things easier when you are going through this. It is difficult to get use to all of the activity and it makes resting hard. I do leave the room from time to time just for a change of pace or to clear my head. I have met a couple other families here whose children have also gone through open heart surgery though mulitiple times. The family whose daughter had the procedure that the surgeon mistakenly explained to us is in the room next to Mia. I talked to her mom this morning and her daughter was adopted too!

I pray that this is the day that Mia begins to "round the corner." I am amazed at all this little girl has been through and long to hold her and see a bit of her personality.

Still fighting

2009-09-10T10:00:00.002-04:00

The plan was to try and take Mia off of the ventilator this morning. Unfortunately when they checked her "gases" today which consists of a blood draw her O2 level was not where it needed to be. I think the plan is to try later today. She has also been running a fever since surgery and they are now treating that with a antibiotic. All of her blood draws look good though they did draw blood again to continue to check. To help bring her fever down they gave her a medicine that basically paralyzes all of her skeletal muscles so that they can pack ice bags around her. The ice bags along with the tylenol seem to work but as soon as it wears off her fever spikes again. She still remains agitated. It is heartbreaking for her to look at me in distress and for me to be powerless. What I wouldn't give to walk this walk for her.

Please be in prayer that she is off to come off the ventilator soon. There is also some talk about taking the chest tubes out today too. The pacemaker was turned down a little today to see how her heart reacts. Please pray that her heart continues to heal and works as it should.

PICU and pink fingers and toes!

2009-09-09T14:53:00.003-04:00

Sorry for the delay in posting. Dan brought the laptop up to the hospital today as I did not want to be lugging it around yesterday with nowhere to go since we did not have a room. Mia is doing well for just having major surgery less than 24 hours ago. The nurses and doctors feel that she is a pretty "typical" case as far as recovery goes. One issue we are having is that she is still experiencing heart arrithymias. This means that her heart is beating irregularly and if it continues she is going to need a pacemaker. I have been in prayer and just believing that her heart will work as it should. Still there is a fear in me as this would mean another surgery and additional surgeries down the road to adjust the pacemaker. I was thrilled to see her pink fingers and toes after surgery! I never noticed just how blue she was until I saw her pink!

They tried to remove the breathing tube this morning but couldn't quite yet. Her O2 levels aren't quite what they should be so I think the plan is to try again later tonight or tommorow. She is also on difficult little girl to sedate! The nurses said a typical child is given pain meds or sedated every 2-3 hours but they are sedating Mia every 45mins. They want her body to rest as much as possible but she is fighting to wake up. What a strong little girl!

Please continue to pray for little Mia! We still have some many obstacles to overcome but I know God's hand is upon her recovery and He will see her through it!

Surgery is complete

2009-09-08T13:49:00.003-04:00

We just talked to the surgeon and he said Mia's surgery went pretty much as expected. He said her pulmonary valve was very narrow. He was able to save her pulmonary valve but in doing so the pressure around her heart is at 70% but he expects it to drop in the next few days. He said a good pressure would be around 40%. If the pressure does not drop he said she would need a pacemaker. My mind will not even go there yet because I am believing that her healing starts NOW! We should be able to see her in the next 20 minutes or so. I am mentally preparing myself for how I will see my little girl. Please continue to keep Mia in your prayers! I am believing for a miraculous recovery for Miss Mia!

Off bypass and closing

2009-09-08T12:23:00.002-04:00

Mia is off bypass and the surgeon is now closing. Blood pressure is good, no irregular heartbeat, and stats look good! Praise God! I am looking forward to talking to the surgeon in a couple hours to get more details of how the surgery went and what we can expect from this point on. Thank you so much for all of your prayers! They are working! God is good!

On bypass

2009-09-08T09:44:00.001-04:00

I just talked to the nurse and she said Mia is doing great and was intubated without any problem. She is now on bypass. The surgeon is now starting the correction process of the surgery. Please continue to keep our sweet girl in your prayers.

In surgery

2009-09-08T09:25:00.003-04:00

We arrived at the hospital at 5:45am and as soon as we went back into the preop room Mia started to cry immediately. After about a half hour she feel asleep in my arms. The surgeon came in and started explaining the surgery procedure to us and started talking about strokes, catheters, and death rates. He also said this is a high risk surgery. It was strange because part of what he was saying seemed to be somewhat related to Mia and I just thought he was talking in medical terms. I thought I am going to let him talk and then ask my questions. Finally Dan said something(I don't even remember) and the surgeon said "Oh I am thinking of tommorow's case which is a Fontan surgery." I was so upset at this point and breathed a sigh of relief as he started to explain Mia's surgery.

Then I was told I would not be able to go back into the operating room as originally planned. With this news I broke down in tears. The child life specialist tried to talk to the doctor but he was adament that I could not be there in case of an emergency. They wheeled Mia and I back to the doors of the operating room. I walked away from the doors with her and whispered in her ear that God loved her and that I was praying His protection over her. I kissed her and told her I loved her and handed her off. It was one of the most difficult things I have ever done.

Thoughts the day before surgery.....

2009-09-07T07:54:00.003-04:00

Tommorow is Mia's surgery day. I don't think you are ever fully prepared for your child to have surgery. Obviously Mia is completely unaware of the mountain she is about to climb tommorow. We, of course, are very aware for the most part of what we are about to face. Even though I know she needs this surgery and her life will tremendously improve, it is getting on the "other side" of the mountain that is hard. I try to focus on the "other side" and look forward to her pink fingers and toes, gaining weight, and Mia having the strength to catch up developmentally. I know she will be a different child a couple months from now and I am so excited to experience all that she will be able to do but "the climb" is difficult. The anticipation of it all is overwhelming.

The day will begin very early tommorow as we have to be at the hospital at 6:15am with surgery scheduled at 7:30am. I have asked the surgery team to allow me to hold Mia as much as possible while they are doing whatever they need to do prior to surgery. I do not want her to be upset before surgery and Mia is wildly upset with medical personnel approaching and touching her. Even holding her in my arms it is quite a battle. I will also be going back into the operating room with her until she falls asleep. I am hoping with these measures in place it will lessen some of her anxiety.

I will be updating our blog throughout the day with her progress. Please keep Mia in your prayers.

Hairbow fun!

2009-09-04T14:43:00.006-04:00

Mia has quite a few headband bows though she rarely ever wears them. I can't even keep shoes and socks on her feet so the idea of a bow on her head seldom crosses my mind. Today as I was pulling out one of her dresses I happened to find a matching bow. I know the bow is almost as big as her head but it is so cute! For fun I decided I would try to put it on Mia fully expecting that she would pull it right off. As soon as I put it on her head I took her over to the mirror to look at herself and she started laughing but she left it alone. I took her downstairs and decided I needed to seize the opportunity that may only come once and take some pictures. She pulled it off but handed it to me wanting it back on.

We went to Target and again she would see her reflection in a window and laugh. As we walked around the store she almost forgot it was there. As we continued to shop she finally yanked it off so I put it beside her in the cart. As we were going to checkout I noticed that the bow was nowhere to be found. I quickly scanned the aisles and went to guest services but no bow. So her beautiful new bow is lost somewhere in Target. Maybe just maybe I will have better luck with barrettes.

Stepping out in faith

2009-08-31T16:24:00.004-04:00

Mia's surgery is one week and less than a day away (not that I am counting or anything). Mia was born with tetralogy of fallot and will have surgery on September 8th to repair her heart. I have to be honest and say that I have never publicly shared Mia's specific heart condition on my blog mainly due to the need I felt to protect her privacy. However I have been blessed by parents whose children have been born with TOF and shared their blogs and I felt the need to share Mia's story in hopes that it might help other families.

Dan and I did not plan to adopt a child with a "major" heart condition. Nope. This was God's plan. The week before we received our referral call we had been considering making some changes to our medical checklist. As I began to pray I felt that God wanted us to trust Him and "step out in faith." A dear friend had just received a referral for her beautiful daughter with TOF days before we made the change. She encouraged me that we could do this! With God's leading and her encouragement we "stepped out in faith" and told our agency that we would consider "major" heart conditions on a case by case basis. We made the change on a Thursday and over the weekend I felt a different kind of peace about our adoption process. I felt like because we had obeyed God that our wait was coming to an end and that very soon Mia would be revealed to us. Still I was guarded and didn't want to get my hopes up.

On Monday as I returned home from walking with my mom, there was message on our machine from our agency saying that they had a question about the recent changes that we made to our medical checklist. My heart started to pound as I knew in the back of my head that they had a child in mind for us but were trying to see what our comfort level was. After we talked, she said "can I put you on hold for a minute?" I responded "okay." What was probably all of 20 seconds felt like 20 minutes. As she got back on the phone she said "well the reason I was asking you all of those questions is because we do have a little girl in mind for you. She is 14 months old and has unrepaired TOF." As soon as she sent us Mia's file and I saw her face I knew she was our daughter. At that moment it didn't matter what her condition was. It wasn't that we didn't take her condition seriously, we just knew. Here in front of us was the face of the little girl we had been waiting for.

A bigger step of faith came when one of the international doctors that reviewed her file labeled Mia "severe risk" due to lack of her medical history, her heart condition, and a smaller head measurement. I was devastated when this report came back. I scoured the internet and adoption boards for "inaccurate head measurments" as this is fairly common in China adoption. It amazed me at how many families had small head measurements for thier children and they are perfectly fine. I then researched, in depth, her heart condition and though it was and still is scary we still felt a peace about it. Of course with certain heart conditions also comes the risk of associated syndromes so I got myself into a panic researching this. What I learned is it is good to have the information about the possible outcomes but sometimes there is a such thing as "too much information" and it isn't always so good thing especially when it causes you to get into fear. Fear can distract you and get in the way of what God wants you to do. Sometimes you just need to rely on the feeling of peace from God and to trust His plan.

Stepping out in faith and accepting Mia's referral has been one the greatest blessings of our lives! I am blessed to call this little girl my daughter and thank God everyday for the peace He gave us that April day!

First day of school

2009-08-25T14:25:00.003-04:00

How I wish the lazy summer days would last a couple more weeks. I really was not ready for school to start again but here we are and the first day of school is here. Sigh. Ethan is in sixth grade which = middle school. Double sigh. It does not seem possible that he is in middle school. Where oh where does the time go?

Enough of that.....the first day went off without a hitch. They all had a good first day back. They were happy to see their friends again and all liked their teachers. Though I was not looking forward to the first day of school I must admit I am looking forward to getting back into some sort of "new" routine again. Maybe just maybe I will find more time to blog. Hey I did do two posts in a day today. That's progress, right?

Fun in the truck

2009-08-25T14:11:00.004-04:00

Just when I was about to get rid of all of Christian's Tonka trucks that he never plays with and make room for kitchen sets and dolls the boys have found a new use for the trucks. They push Mia around in the back of the dump truck and she loves it! She seems to fit perfectly in the back and laughs as they give her a ride around the house. She sure has her brothers wrapped around her finger!

One month ago

2009-08-12T15:29:00.009-04:00

One month ago you were place in our arms. All of our hopes, dreams, and prayers were realized in that moment.

We were thrilled to get some smiles!

We are so blessed to have been given the incredible gift of you! Happy one month together baby girl! We love you!

The number 17

2009-08-12T08:15:00.004-04:00

When we submitted our medical checklist I had a feeling that the number 17 would somehow relate to our adoption process. I know is sounds strange but I really felt like the number 17 held some significance to our adoption. Not in a weird way, I thought it probably meant that when Mia was referred to us that she would be 17 months old. Or maybe we would wait 17 months? Nope we surpassed that waiting 18 1/2 months. Would we get the call on the 17th of the month? Nope we got the call on the 27th of the month. When we finally got the call and Mia was 14 months old I could not figure out how the number 17 fit into our adoption until our travel call came. We received Mia on her 17 month old "birthday." It all made sense and finally the significance of "17" was revealed!

Presents for Mia

2009-08-11T15:14:00.006-04:00

Mia has received quite a few presents since we have returned home. As the gifts started arriving a sadness fell over me and I wondered if she was ever given a present before. I am not sure the answer to that question but Logan helped her and she seemed to know what she was doing. Of course like any typical toddler she loved the wrapping paper and bows more than the actual present. I guess she doesn't find a piggy bank and clothing all that interesting. I love looking at all of the girly clothing that she has received and I am starting to feel a tad jealous of her stylish fall/winter wardrobe. It is going to be tough to keep up with this girl! I think Ann Taylor Loft is calling me!

Beautiful brown eyed girl

2009-08-03T15:03:00.003-04:00

I bought this shirt at Target over two years ago in hopes of my daughter one day wearing it. It says "everyone loves a brown eyed girl." While waiting for our referral, I looked at countless blogs with beautiful little Asian girls sporting this cute shirt and couldn't wait for Mia to wear it. Oh how I love this little brown eyed girl!

Busy first week home!

2009-07-30T06:53:00.004-04:00

Nothing like jumping right back into the business of life! We came home to the boys having football or soccer practices every week night and school starting in less than a month. Great timing, huh? I would have loved to have gotten a week under my belt of adjusting to being a family of six before the sports craziness began but that was not to be!

Mia had her first cardiologist appointment on Tuesday. Surgery is tentatively scheduled for September 8. We were at the hospital most of the day for various tests and we also met with a nutritionist. The cardiologist suggested that we try and boost Mia's nutrition as much as possible before she undergoes surgery. She is tiny at 15.8lbs so I think that this is the best course of action for Mia. She is a great eater and hopefully it is just a matter of continuing to make sure she is getting extra calories and putting on a little bit of weight. I may not have mentioned this, but in China, her nannies told us that they spoon fed Mia all of her liquids. She has no idea how to drink from a bottle or sippy cup so this has posed another challenge but we are slowly working on it. Another challenge we are facing is that Mia is behind developmentally and we may need to look into physical therapy. She is unsteady sitting up and is nowhere near walking. I am trying to hold off on the physical therapy for awhile because I would like to see what she is able to accomplish on her own here with us. I also am concerned about her emotional state and too many changes being thrown at her at once. Right now she seems to be interacting and bonding really well with us and I don't want to disrupt that.

Mia was at the pediatrician yesterday not for a physical checkup but for a sinus infection. The poor baby has had a cold since we left China and was miserable yesterday. Her first appointment with the pediatrician is not scheduled until August 25. I am going to talk to the pediatrician today because she really needs to be seen sooner with surgery scheduled for September.

We are having a great time getting to know our little girl. I know I continue to mention it but it is amazing to me that with all the life changes she has been through that she still laughs, giggles, and smiles at us. She thinks the boys are hilarious! She is a great little sleeper and she is already on US time! Yeah! She loves to be held but does not like her snugli so my arms are really getting a good workout! She is becoming more familar with toys and is even starting to find a few favorites though she will play with anything she can get in her hands on. I love to try and see things through her eyes knowing that this is probably the first time she is experiencing it.

Our lives have definitely changed and we are all adjusting to our new way of life with a toddler. Life is busy, busy, busy but we are all loving our little Mia!

There's no place like home!

2009-07-27T07:03:00.005-04:00

After nearly 20 hours of travel time we are finally home! We arrived home around 10:30pm on Friday night to a wonderful but emotional homecoming! We were greeted by my parents, the boys, my sister, and my good friend Bev. It was a perfect homecoming after such a long flight. Mia did great on the long journey home and slept between Dan and I on the big flight from Beijing to Newark, NJ from 9:00pm to 4:30am. Everyone was so excited to meet her and she did so well with all of the attention.

We are slowly recovering from jet lag and Saturday was pretty much a blur. Mia and I both returned home with colds. Each day we are feeling a little better and are so glad to be back on US soil! There is no place like home!

Last post until China!

2009-07-07T06:12:00.003-04:00

We are all packed and ready to go. We will leave in the the early morning tommorow. This will be my last post on this blog until we return home. To continue to follow our journey in China you can visit us at

www.youbelong.net/thepetersons

Please pray for safe travels and peace as we leave the boys. Also pray that we make it through the temperature check when we arrive in China without incident. Next post will be from China!

Our travel itinerary

2009-07-06T18:33:00.002-04:00

7/8 Leave US for Beijing

7/9 Arrive in Beijing (we arrive in Beijing at 1:50 pm China time)

7/10-7/11 Tour Beijing

7/12 Depart Beijing for Zhengzhou

7/13 Mia Day!!!!

7/14 Adoption Registration

7/15 Free day or optional tours

7/16 Receive notary documents/free day/optional tours

7/17 Receive Mia's passport/leave Zhengzhou and fly to Guangzhou

7/18 Mia's visa photo and physical

7/19 Free time. Rest/Shop(oh yeah)/tour

7/20 Tuberculosis test though I think Mia will be free from this test because she is under 2

7/21 Free day with an option to shop(oh yeah again!) or tour unless we need to visit the clinic for a chest x-ray

7/22 Consulate appointment (getting closer to home)

7/23 Go to US Consulate to take our oath (closer to being homeward bound)

7/24 Leave Guangzhou for Beijing and then onto the good ole USA! Mia will officially become a US citizen as soon as we land on American soil!

I will miss you most of all.....

2009-07-05T22:06:00.006-04:00

Remember the Wizard of Oz and the tearful goodbye at the end when Dorothy prepares to leave in the hot air balloon? She says goodbye to the scarecrow last and with tears running down her face says "I will miss you most of all." It goes without saying that I will miss my boys most of all. It will be a hard 16 days without them. Honestly this is one of the most difficult things I have ever done. Each day since we began this journey I have prayed for the strength to be able leave them and board that plane to China. In my heart I know that I have a child that needs me to bring her home but it is still hard to leave three big pieces of my heart behind.

To Ethan, Logan, and Christian as we prepare to leave for China to bring Mia home I have a couple thoughts to share with you. First, I am so very proud of you for being willing to unselfishly share your parents with a little girl you have yet to meet. Not once have you complained about the football tryouts we will miss or the soccer practices we will not be here for. You have made the anxiety of leaving a little less difficult. You may feel a little sad from time to time and you may even miss us, right? Be a comfort to each other. I know that grandma and grandpa will take good care of you but each of you are a piece of "home" and are able to bring comfort to one another. A kind word or gesture could make a big difference! Of course the house rules still apply whether we are in China or not. Behave, speak kindly, do not aggravate, help out, eat your dinner. Remember we have eyes and ears everywhere, even on the other side of the world! Most importantly have fun and enjoy making wonderful memories with grandma and grandpa!

We love you and will miss you most of all! When we are reunited as a family, just as in the movie, I am sure we will all agree "there's no place like home."

One week to travel and the enormity of it all

2009-07-01T14:44:00.005-04:00

In one week we will be boarding a plane headed to China. "I can't believe it" are words we have said countless times over the past couple of weeks but fail to do justice to the enormity of it all. Leaving the boys behind for 16 days, traveling to the other side of the world, and adopting a child we know very little about(but have fallen in love with) is enormous! Our lives are about to change in a big way!

In less than two weeks, on July 13, I will meet the little girl that once only lived in my dreams. I will hold the little girl that I have prayed for. In an instant she will become our daughter, a sister, a granddaughter, and a niece. As much as I have imagined many times what that moment will be like for us, I find myself lately wondering what that moment will be like for her. Frightening, scary, uncomfortable, unaware, these are just some of the feelings that come to mind. With these thoughts my heart breaks for all that she is losing and being taken away from.

She doesn't know how much she is loved and wanted. She doesn't know that we will never leave her and that we are her last "stop". She is unaware of the countless prayers that have been said for her. Prayers that she was being well cared and loved until we could be united. Soon she is going to be part of a world and family that she knows nothing about. We look different, we smell different, and we speak differently. She has no idea how her life is going to change. Our joy could be one of her greatest sorrows.

My thoughts also turn to her birthmother as we prepare to meet Mia. In my heart and because of information in her initial paperwork I believe that her birthmother loved her but due to circumstances could not care for her. I believe through her unselfish sacrifice we have the honor of calling her "our daughter." She will always hold a special place in my heart for the incredible gift she has given us.

Mia has also grown very close to her foster mother as mentioned in her paperwork. I can never thank her enough for the love and care she has provided Mia. I hope through her love for Mia that she is more able to accept our love.

I pray that on July 13, our little girl's heart will be prepared to meet us and accept us. I believe this can only happen through the power of prayer. Only God , in His goodness, can take her fear and give her a sense of peace. We are prepared for whatever may come but with God anything is possible!

Two weeks from today and a new travel blog

2009-06-24T15:58:00.002-04:00

Two weeks from today we will be on a plane headed to China! We have been super busy with packing. All of Mia's stuff is officially packed! I will pack for Dan and I the weekend before we leave because I know I will be down to the last minute before I figure out what I will be bringing as far as clothing goes. I am trying hard not overpack and so far I have been quite please with what I have packed so far. We are taking advantage of every inch of space and of course do not want to go over the weight limit or lug heavy luggage around.

We have also decided to change our blogsite while we are in China. I have heard of families being unable to access their blogs from China using blogspot and do not want to take the chance that this could happen. I will post on this site until we leave and after we return but our travel site is www.youbelong.net/thepetersons. We can't wait to share this amazing journey with all of you!

Flights are booked!!!

2009-06-22T18:37:00.002-04:00

Whew! I can finally breathe a sigh of relief, at least, for the next hour until I find something else to fret over! OUR FLIGHTS ARE BOOKED! Our official travel dates are July 8-July 24. We just received confirmation of our CA(consulate appointment) in China for July 22. We will take an oath on July 23 and we are free to leave for the good ole USA on July 24!

We have TA!

2009-06-18T17:40:00.002-04:00

We received our TA (travel approval) today from our agency! WAHOO! This is the final piece of the puzzle and now we can begin to plan our travel. Our agency is working on scheduling our CA (consulate appointment in China) and after that is confirmed we can book our flights! Our tentative travel dates are July 8th to July 22! We are going to China!

Ebay to the rescue

2009-06-16T10:52:00.003-04:00

After the slight initial shock of my bald little beauty and after deciding there is simply no point in bringing the hairbows I have collected for years to China I found a solution on ebay~baby headbands! After three boys there is no way I can go to China without being able to put one hairbow in my daughter's hair or around her head in this case. I have to admit this headband/hairbow thing could become slightly addicting. Some of the headbands with the flowers and such look like they could be bigger than her head! Hopefully she will cooperate and wear her headbands without any fuss. If not at least I made the effort, however vain it may be.

New pictures of Mia!

2009-06-15T14:38:00.004-04:00

I opened my e-mail today to find a updated pictures of Mia! It was an answer to prayer because I have really been praying for some new pictures and an update on our little girl! Unfortuantely the orphanage gave her a new "summer do" and shaved her head! Forget the hairbows and bring on the sunblock and summer hats!

I e-mailed our agency because in her initial reports it states that she is in foster care but her update mentions the orphanage a couple times. I am hoping we get our TA within the next couple of weeks so that we can travel in July. For now her new pictures have made my day!

Still making progress

2009-06-12T18:29:00.002-04:00

Wow! That was fast! We received our new I-171H today with on fingerprints updated. We were just fingerprinted on June 3rd and I really wasn't expecting our new I-171H for another couple weeks. Maybe since our case has been sitting there since 2006 it moved faster. Who knows but I will take progress wherever I can get it! We also received our Chinese visas back today~less than two weeks after we applied! If only everything and everyone worked this quickly! The next piece of the puzzle is our travel approval (TA). I am going to "guess" because I am feeling hopeful today and still praying for July travel that we will get our TA within the next two weeks. Optimistic, aren't I?

Still praying for an update and new pictures of little Mia. Of course I know that this may not happen but since I am feeling so hopeful I will put it out there. I have this horrible feeling that because our pictures are from when she was a young baby that on our gotcha day I am not going to be able to recognize her. Sigh. I would love to have a little preview via updated pictures of what our little toddler looks like now.

I am still organizing and buying things here in there in anticipation of travel. I am seriously overwhelmed with some of the packing lists I have found. A tub for sanitizing bottles and tongs to remove the bottles from the boiling water? I never in a million years would have thought of this! Who knew? Obviously we have never been to China before so what do we know but I can't imagine having enough room in our luggage to pack half of the "stuff" I have found on packing lists! Did I mention that my dh loathes overpacking? I have a feeling if I "try" to pack all this "stuff" and my dh has to haul it all he may just leave me behind! For those of you who have BTDT I would love to know some of the "stuff" you absolutely could not have done without.

Accomplishments of this week

2009-06-02T21:28:00.003-04:00

I managed to dig myself out from the mound of paperwork from travel packet II that we got on Friday. Happy weekend to me! It was happy don't get me wrong I am just tired of paperwork! Oh and I hit a snafu (completely through fault of my own) with our LOA that we received on Saturday. We were suppose to date it year/month/day but somehow I missed it even though it was clearly stated on the letter and signed 5/29/09. I quickly realized "my" mistake and corrected it but not before spending all weekend worrying if this would somehow cause further delays. Fortunately, I e-mailed our agency Monday morning and she didn't think it would be a problem. In fact she said another family just did the same thing. Good now I don't feel quite as stupid!

We mailed our visa applications and the remaining paperwork in travel packet II. Also included was a very substantial cashier's check to our agency for our orphanage donation. That one stung for just a minute! We figure the less money we have to physicially carry on our beings the better!

This is all starting to feel very real. Our world is soon going to change forever. I can't wait to see it all unfold.

LOA! LOA! LOA!

2009-05-31T07:52:00.003-04:00

We received our LOA on Friday! Wahooooo! That was fast! Honestly I wasn't expecting it for another couple of weeks but I'll take it! Our estimated travel is in 5-8 weeks which puts us in China somewhere in July. I am told it is so HOT in July. Hot and humid like we have never experienced! We have started working on the paperwork in travel packet II and have everything filled out and notorized that requires it. We have 5-7 days to send the paperwork back to our agency and I hope to get it in the mail by Tuesday. We are making progress!

Next step is our TA and since we are through review this should come pretty quickly! We are almost there!

School's OUT!

2009-05-29T11:15:00.002-04:00

The boy's last day of school was yesterday. I went to the school in the afternoon to help with the last day festivities. The game I helped with was the "sombero toss" which was quite interesting because of the breeze blowing! Picture little kids trying to toss somberos onto three pegs and the wind catching the hat and blowing it away! The games ended a little early and the kids went back to their classrooms to watch a movie. I did think about leaving them at school to enjoy my last hour of "freedom" but I ended up asking them if they were ready to go home. Logan and Christian were ready to leave and already had their bookbags packed. We stopped by Ethan's classroom and he said he wanted to stay. I was a little surprised but figured he must want to soak in his last day of elementary school and say goodbye to his friends.

At 3:30 the bus pulled up to the house and Ethan came in the living room and sat on the couch and just stared at me. I said "are you okay?" He said "yes." I knew he was sad with it being his last time in "his" school as a student. I gave him a hug and we both started crying. He said he was sad to have to say goodbye to his friends and to school.

Turns out I am not the only one who is feeling a bit emotional about the ending of one journey and the begining of another. I am glad we have a couple months to enjoy the summer before we begin the new adventure of middle school. Let the summer begin!

San Diego Marathon

2009-05-27T10:35:00.014-04:00

"The marathon's about being in contention over the last 10K. That's when it's about what you have in your core. You have run all the strength, all the superficial fitness out of yourself, and it really comes down to what's left inside you. To be able to draw deep and pull something out of yourself is one of the most tremendous things about the marathon." - Rob de Castella

This Sunday my sister, brother in law, and brother will be running the San Diego marathon. This is such a big achievement for each of them but especially my sister. My sister has struggled with arthritis since she was a child. I can remember when we were younger and she was in grade school that her arthritis would be so bad that there were many mornings that she would not be able to get out of bed because her legs were so stiff that she couldn't walk. She literally would wait in the morning for my dad to carry her out to the kitchen table to eat breakfast and get ready for the day. Still every morning no matter how much pain she was in or how difficult it was to move she got up. Not once do I remember her crying. Not once do I remember her feeling sorry for herself. Never did she give up even when she couldn't participate in the sports she loved she was still there, on the sidelines, cheering her team on. Even when she wasn't feeling 100% she got out there on the basketball court and gave 100%.

A couple weeks back as my sister was running and had a few more miles to go to get to her 20 miles she ran by a group of people. All of the sudden it occured to her that the group that she just ran past was a local arthritis group. She told us that tears just started flowing. She thought of all she had been through and to now be training for a marathon was just overwhelming.

On Saturday quite an accomplishment will be achieved. I am so proud of her! I know she will make it. Her determination and perseverance will see her through it. The same spirit that caused a little girl to get up every day with a smile on her face fighting through the pain is the same spirit that will help her cross that finish line!